The day that broke the camel's back ....

The day that broke the camel's back.....me being the camel.

So I am on my way nine months into my recovery from my gastric bypass ...feeling good...losing good...fitting into clothes I never thought I would every again ...out for the day with my babe....sun was shining and WHAM!

Young man, still with his 7-11 work shirt on, iPod on the steering wheel, ear buds in.  I was in the passenger seat one leg crossed over the other because I was sending an email to my boss about an upcoming shift.  Tony had seen ...just seen ...the car coming up from behind us and had a split second to think "oh shit" ....then I felt the impact which flew my iPad off my lap and launched me forward.  My leg was in a wacky position and I immediately started to cry.  Yes, I did have my seatbelt on.  I know if I hadn't my head would have totally have hit the dash.  I was looking down when we were hit so my neck was in immediate pain.  Tony got out of the car and the kid rips his ear buds out of his ears and throws his iPod on the seat and got out with the attitude like WE had just inconvenienced him!  Really? Well when my 6'1" 325lbs husband got out .....the kids back down a few notches and called the police.  The ambulance came and I SO didn't want to go because the last time I was in an ambulance was from my motorcycle accident and it was SO scary and uncomfortable but my neck hurt and my ear was strangely numb.  So they strapped me in and off I went to Kent.  Arriving at Kent was a complete joke. I continuously complained of a numb left ear and a numb feeling in my cheek to no avail.  I was told it was because of the thing on my neck that the sound was muffled.  Dude ...I slid 87 feet on the hot asphalt just two years before and didn't remember my ear and side of my face feeling numb from the neck thingy.  A quick look over and boy do I mean QUICK LIKE 10 min asked me a few questions, STILL, telling them about the numb ear ...they didn't care.  NO X-RAYS and I was on  my way like a drive thru at a fast food restaurant!  They must have been thinking " sure another Rhode Islander who got rear ended and can't wait to sue" I was still sooooo upset I don't even remembering getting back home in bed.   I slept the rest of the day.

Upon waking the next day my ear was still numb, now the side of my face was numb and my BPPV had been activated.  

Quick lesson: " Benign paroxysmal positional vertigo (BPPV) is the most common disorder of the inner ear’s vestibular system, which is a vital part of maintaining balance. BPPV is benign, meaning that it is not life-threatening nor generally progressive. BPPV produces a sensation of spinning called vertigo that is both paroxysmal and positional, meaning it occurs suddenly and with a change in head position. 

BPPV occurs as a result of otoconia, tiny crystals of calcium carbonate that are a normal part of the inner ear’s anatomy, detaching from the otolithic membrane in the utricle and collecting in one of the semicircular canals. When the head is still, gravity causes the otoconia to clump and settle (Figure 1). When the head moves, the otoconia shift. This stimulates the cupula to send false signals to the brain, producing vertigo and triggering nystagmus (involuntary eye movements)"

I had been symptom free for almost a year up until that point. Cause I do these stupid exercises to get the little calcium deposits to get to a place for them not to cause trouble.

It is just a pain in the ass and that lasted about a week.  In the meantime I began to feel pain in my lower back. Which was weird because I never had back issues and after losing all my weight my back actually felt like a million bucks.  But I chalked it up to sleeping in the wrong position, working third shift and going to school full time.  But then it became where I could not even do my job.  I could no longer help with clients getting dressed or in and out of bed without me asking for a lot of assistance from a co worker so I was like WTF I guess I should go get it looked at.  Well what they found was not pretty.  I go there and the doc says so what brings you here to see me today and I said .....I had an awesome back before September 6th, got rear ended and now my back is getting progressively worse.  At that time a chiropractor had been working on my neck and all was hunky dory but he did want to touch my lower back until we got som X-rays. 

Once the Chiro saw this he didn't want to touch that shit with a 10ft pole.  Can you see the break?  And the slippage forward. Follow the Spine bones down and you see one that has a space ...yea that's not sposed to be there. You know that song "one of things is not like the other...." 

Sssoooooooo now the doc is like yea you cannot work because my job requires I lift at least 40lbs at any given time so I was out of work Nov 15th.  I applied for FMLA which only hold your position for 13 weeks.  Also here I am on a trajectory to finish school for Spring of 2015 with my Bachelors in Psychology so I am dealing with the pain and still going to school with a time bomb in my back.  I go back to see him March 4th he takes another X-ray and is like ....you cannot wait any longer.  I say well if you can get me in before spring break which was the week after then let's do it.  I was on the operation table two days later.  Blue Cross approved that shit like nothing after seeing the X-rays and MRIs.  So now I missed a day or so of school to get my family, house and shit in order.  Pre op testing and blah blah blah.

So the surgery goes well.  What doesn't go well is apparently my body doesn't like pain meds ....like any pain meds.  They were causing my blood pressure to do funky things and one time it was as low as 45/37!  My lips turned blue and I kinda blacked out and lost consciousness and next thing I was back in bed with a catheter re-inserted with instructions to not get up at all.  I was very disappointed in my  body and everything.  It was nothing like the gastric bypass. The pain was way more intense and because they felt the pain meds were messing with my BP they took my button away ASAP and put me on HALF the dosage of what you would  normally give someone after this kind of operation.  But we finally did find the right combination and I was finally able to stand and pee on my own and damn once you do that they are shipping your ass out of there.  But I was there five days instead of the anticipated two and that totally fuxked with my head.  Here is the before and after pictures

And here are the two separated

As you can see the slippage is still there and I will have to live with that the rest of my life.  Apparently when they got in there they had to also perform a laminectomy as well as the fusion and could not line up that vertebra. Eh, it is what it is.

So now my FMLA has run up.  I basically have lost my job because by law they do not have to hold my position for me but did offer for me to come back as a sub for a dollar less an hour and a schedule that is like an "on call" thing which obviously I cannot do with two teenagers and a full time school schedule.  So not it's all in the doctors and lawyers hands.  And I need these people to speed this shit up.  I see the doc  next week so we will see what he says.  Here is what the incision looked like after surgery

DO NOT LOOK IF YOU HET SQUEAMISH!

Not too bad...I have to say I had NO bruising and it looks still pretty good. 19 staples ....come on!  You couldn't throw one more in there to make it 20!? Lol!

Here it is with the staples out and it is looking better everyday but now my muscles are WICKED pissed off and I am still in pain with some things.  Driving totally sucks but I gotta do it.  My dad helped with school for the first week taking me and Tony picked me up.  But that just sucked.  So I am driving again and the incision and the muscles hurt while driving.

Emotionally this back surgery has weighed way more heavily on me than the motorcycle AND the gastric bypass.  But I am not going to dwell on it and that is for another day.  I need to get some sleep and snuggle with my pups!  Nighty night all!

These are the stupid exercise I need to do for my BPPV!

Peace

~t

  

1 YEAR, 12 MONTHS, 365 DAYS, 8760 HOURS, 525,600 MINUTES, 31,536,000SECONDS…

I cannot believe it has been a year.  And I cannot believe it has been almost a month past that year since I have found the time to write about it.

In 2013, on Valentine's Day, I decide to love "myself" and have RNY gastric bypass.  If you go back, back in my blog you can read about all the leading up to that.  This post is about how I have been doing over the past year.

Let's start physically.  Right now I am holding at 160-164 depending on the day and a size 12/14 depending on the company.  I can wear a L shirt but I kinda still like a lot of XL for a comfy factor.  I had gotten as low as 148lbs but people started making comments about my looking sick and that my eyes looked baggy.  I personally would like to hover between 155-158.  But there is a reason for the small weight gain ....that's another post! ☻ I can move around better.  I can put my body into crazy positions and skip up the stairs. (Before the auto accident ....another post)

Here is the thing about my weight loss physically.  I always promised to be brutally honest.  I have no exercise routine.  I do not go to the gym.  I do not lift weights, not even tiny small ones.  I do not do sit ups or push ups or planking.  I do not run matprathons and really don't feel the need to.  I like the "idea" of running and was hoping to try it but school takes up a lot of my time.  

This all makes me very conflicted.  I feel guilty.  I am not saying I do NOTHING. I walk the neighborhood with the dogs.  Run in the ball field here and there with one of my pups that love to play fetch.  But I see others who are going to the gym 3,4,5 times a week.  Some are losing fast and some are loading slower no matter what they do.  Here I am having lost my first 100lbs in under 6 months and about 20 lbs or so in the other six.  I hit my goal weight and then some in under a year.  Did I work hard following the rules with eating?  Hell yes!

So I guess here is where I fall into the emotional part of it.  People ask me what have I done to lose all that weight after surgery.  What exercise routine I have?  My arms and thighs look good, well decent compare to others who started off looking like me in the beginning, what kinds of exercises I do.  I don't lie ....I say nothing.  Just day to day stuff.  I was ALWAYS an active person. always active in the yard, the house just generally not able to sit still. I NEVER let my weight stop me before.  I know and am so happy for those who are always trying new things because now they can!  It is so wonderful!  But I never let anything stop me before.  If someone said "climb that tree over there" shit ....fat or not I would be climbing my ass up or die trying.  If I went to an amusement park and they were like  " hmmmmm ...you may not fit comfortably on this ride" fuck off ....squeeze my ass on there!  So sometimes I feel like the only thing that has changed has been the amount of food I am able to eat and the healthier choices I made. I worked DAMN hard BEFORE surgery.  And THAT is what I contribute my success to.  I started probably two years before I even considered surgery doing little things.  NO FAST FOOD, then portion control, NO SECONDS EVER! The watching sugar intake and carbs.  Then I did add a wee bit of exercise like walking the dogs more than usual.

Now I am saying, BY NO MEANS, people should not be exercising or can or could achieve the same results as I did without a regimented exercise routine.

Once again I feel like you have to do what's right for you!

And that leads me to my next post where the shit hit the fan!

But before I do that ....as a wonderful surgiversary present to myself I decided to hire a photographer to take some pictures of me naked.  And I want to do this as a yearly treat to myself to document how my body changes and ages along time.  Also did some boudoir pictures and pin up pictures for my man for Valentines Day!  I have to say it was the most awesome experience I have ever had!  I came to my friends house just out of the shower in a cami and some grey yoga pants.  Then I had her photograph me literally undressing ( the photographer not my friend lol) I have fully naked ones that I obviously cannot share or maybe I will one day but if anyone wants to do anything special for yourselves ...do this!  This young woman is a wonderful mom, and is trying to run her photography business so she can stay home with her new baby.  She set up in my friends house like a professional studio and it was amazing!  Please look her up for any kind of photos you need!  Weddings, baby pictures, senior pictures, etc.  You will be glad you did.  Here is her website:  http://doinaabukarma.smugmug.com

Meanwhile here are some of my favorites:

Inspiring minds want to know....

This was written in January of 2014 but just posting it now.

It has been said to me that my journey inspires people.  That I am an inspiration for others who are pre-op and post-op.  I have a great sense of humor and aura and people love being around my energy.  While this makes me feel wonderful, it is hard for me to hear.  I have never been one to receive compliments easily.  I feel awkward when I get them.  Not that I don't believe in myself or feel like I deserve them .... It just feels awkward.  I am struggling more and more when out and about people are complimenting my appearance more.  THIS is something that has never really happened much at all.  Strangers randomly smiling at me, holding doors and actually verbally complimenting me.
I want to share my journey with those who want to hear about it.  I want people to see how my life has changed since surgery.  I want people to be able to read that and feel connected to more themselves and not necessarily me.  I love that I inspire them but I want them to look inside themselves and find that natural strength we all have, that they possess but did not realize they could tap into. Dig deep for it on those days when things seem bleak.

And if they can build strength on my journey to do so then that makes me happy.

~T

Me and puppy

Two years ago  I bought this sweatshirt.  I was at Niagara Falls to visit my cousin.  I went on the maid of the mist and wanted a sweatshirt so bad.  They didn't have a zip up one because I needed a 2X and they were just too much money.  I found this sweatshirt.  It, too, is a 2X.  I could barely pull it over my body but I wanted it!  I could imagine how comfy it would be if I could wrap myself up in it and sit all cozy on the couch with the hood on.  Go out on a brisk fall day and just throw it on.  But when I got home it was just too tight.  But I put it in a drawer and someday I knew I would wear it and be comfy in it.  The other day I pulled it out and put it on.   Now it is VERY big!  I fit in it with SO much room and apparently room for the pup as well! The last picture in the series is me and the pup this morning snuggling in the sweatshirt!   I seriously had to squeeze my body into it back then! 

Here are some more pics from that trip two years ago and ones I took just this past October.

I am amazed at how my body has changed!  I had a great weekend time that first summer.  It was probably my heaviest ...around 278-280.  But I swam in my bathing suit, walked all around Niagara Falls.  Made an 8-10 hour trip to and from driving.  Walked around all day with the kid.  Went to one of the Great Lakes (in my bathing suit but had shorts on cause I don't like sand in THAT area lol!) with the cuz and the kids and lived life.  This past rip the whole fam went and we did lots of fun things too.  I realized that I never let my weight stop me from being who I was, my love for life and how I held myself as a plus sized woman! I was always confident, had as much fun as I could and loved life to the fullest.  The only thing that has changed with me now is that I am smaller.  I still have the same smile, the same sense of humor, the same love for life and the same confidence!  I live healthier now but that is not even the biggest thing.  I appreciate how much being a plus sized woman made me who I am today because I really didn't know any different.  Some people worry that you change after surgery.  The only thing that has changed is my physical measurements.  I am the same fun loving, goofy, never sit still, procrastinating, confident, obnoxious, silly, creative, fun loving, sometimes too sensitive and happy self!  Love it, believe it ....or leave it!

Peace

Tami

Bloggity Blog Blog

 

Wow!  I cannot believe how much time has passed since the last time I have written in this blog.
A lot has been going on.
I went back to college full time.  Working full time.  Then got into a small car accident (rear-ended) and got taken out of work.
Got a bilateral break on one of the lower vertebra and a bulging disc.  YAY!
But despite that, I am still doing well with my staying on a healthy track.  I have strayed a little.
Swedish fish and jolly rancher chews!  DAMN THEM!
I have to go for my 9month blood work and then Dr. Roye in January.  I had an appointment with him in December but damn I was too wrapped up in trying to survive my first semester back in college.
So next week I am going one morning.  Just to get it over with.  My last one, the 6month one, was good.  He said one of my proteins could be a little better but he was fine with it and very happy about my progress!
I had gotten down as low as 148 (from my highest of 278 last year) but quickly DIDN'T stay there.  I am running about 153-156 on any given day.  I honestly do not let the scale stress me out and I only weigh myself in the morning after a shower, in my birthday suit! And I only do it every other day.
I have gone up to 159 and back down again.  I feel honestly happy about where I am.  I want it to stay under 160 and never as low as 145 cause the 148 I thought I looked kinda sick.
But I tend to look saggy baggy on days where my water intake sucks. 
So what the HELL has been going on?
What changes have I noticed?

Well ... people talk to me.  Like make eye contact, speak to me, hold doors for me.
I was like what the hell are all these crazy people doing?
I was never a shy person.  Never let my weight slow me down or prevent me from doing something.  I always made eye contact and am a genuine people watcher.  But now they WATCH back!
I look at people and they like look BACK at me!
It actually  makes me feel kinda weird.  I am the same person on the inside but obviously NOT on the outside.  Why is this?
Maybe before I was "invisible" to them because of my weight.  People kinda walked around and either was not noticing me or didn't want to look at the fat girl? 
I personally stare at people JUST as much as I always have.  Now I get "why is that crazy bitch stalking me with her eyes" or I get smiles back.  Then I kinda jump cause I am not used to people actually making eye contact back.
Now I notice people looking at me like ALL the time.  This has made me weirdly kinda shy.
Okay that's messed up right?  Here I am 130lbs lighter and want people to STOP looking at me but when I was larger I was like "why doesn't anyone look at me?"  Not that I really cared but its just odd.

Something I have learned over the past few months as well.
Not everyone wants to hear, see or know about my journey.  I have actually have had a few people stop talking to me.   People who used to talk to me daily, weekly or monthly ...now ... not so much or not at all.  Maybe its not me. I mean, I am not that spectacular but it seems coincidental with some of the people.  That since the surgery they do not talk to me anymore.  And some of them I miss and some not so much.
But I say whatever.  I have not changed personality wise ... so whatever.
I just wish, if the weight loss is the issue they would just man up and say it and kick me in the balls if I need it.  I can be humbled.  They can be honest.  I am a tough chick.
but again ... whatevs.

A good friend of mine told me gently (and I am actually TRULY thankful) that she is happy ... so happy for me and all I have accomplished BUT not everyone wants to hear about it and especially when I am around those who are larger, who may or may not be struggling with their weight, want to hear how I am so amazed that I "let myself get that big" or "what was I thinking" or "man I looked like I was going to explode".  They don't want to see picture after pictures of side by sides. 
I am so thankful she told me this and I now have decided to share all my weight loss stuff on this blog.  Cause people can then decide for themselves if they WANT to go and see and read about my journey.  It won't be like IN THIER FACE!  And if I had been doing this to anyone who is reading this ... I am sorry if in any way I made you feel uncomfortable. 

Sometimes it takes someone to kinda pull you back down to earth when you are flying so high on yourself.  So I am only going to talk about it to people who ask.  People who want to know about me and my journey can come here to see pics, look at my diet, what I am doing to stay healthy, what is pissing me off, what is working and not working and so on.  They will have to actively seek out the information and that works for me.

Naturally I am proud of myself and excited.  I have NEVER EVER been this small as an adult.  EVER.  It still is amazing.  I never disliked myself before but looking at pictures from the past kinda make me sad.  People say "I don't EVER remember you looking like that" and I take that as a compliment because that means they never saw a big woman.  They saw a woman that was fun, confident and just a goof ball.  I always smiled.  I never let shit stop me from doing stuff.  If I didn't fit into something and I wanted to do it ... I squeezed my shit in there man! LOL!
I always thought I was pretty, smart and fun.  Every now and then I was like WTF I want those jeans or I wish I could look like some skinny girl working a cool shirt or something.  Or someone would day "Damn Tony's wife is pretty" instead of "funny" or "creative" or "she makes me laugh"
which are a big girls WORST nightmares to hear.  Just sayin'
But I never woke up and disliked who I was physically.  But when I look at the pictures now ... I feel sad and kinda mad that I had let it get to an unhealthy point. And my weight WAS making me unhealthy.  It was a fact.  Bloodwork, tests and sugar numbers don't lie ... no matter how much you love yourself and proud to be a big woman.
 But I also feel proud because I never let my size define me.

My body feels weird now.  I can feel bones everywhere.  I am often like wtf ... what is that pain?  Oh shit my ass bone is on this hard chair and it hurts.  I have lots of skin hanging.  Lots.  But surprisingly it does not really make me as mad as I thought.  I thought ... hell yea I am SO getting surgery for that shit if it gets crazy.  Now ... I am not feeling it.   I have not really gone balls to the wall with working out.  I am going to try that first.  My arms are not that bad.  My stomach is not as bad as I thought and my boobs ... well they are just boobs! LOL!  I DID have two kids!
I don't mind wearing some spanx to hold all that in.  My legs are pretty saggy (upper thighs) much more than I thought out of every thing because I never thought I had that much fat on my legs.  I mean summer isn't here yet either so I may chime back in then and be like "PREP THE OR!"  LOL!  but as of right now ... I am not feeling reconstructive surgery.  I genuinely need to feel like I have done all I could to tighten it all up and I mean like hard core regimen to see if it can be done before I think about that. 
Well if it was not for this damn back issue I would start.  But doc says NO to any kind of lifting, pulling, pushing ... etc.  So I am going to heal up, keep on my good eating and just think about school for now.  But spring is going to be my thing!

I just took some new pics today.  Ones with my clothes and one with just a bra and undies. I want to post them because when I was pre-op I was desperately looking for women who looked like me and what they looked like afterwards.  I only found a few.  I am not shy I will put them up but ... not sure if I feel like listening to some of my family.  I mean I don't really care but yet then I do.  I really and truly want to help those who are going through this or any kind of weight loss ... I want them to know what your skin possibly may look like.  I SO wanted to see and I think it would have helped me be prepared a bit more. I mean, I was having the operation anyway but it is nice to see how different bodies react to the surgery.  To have a wide range of bodies to look at.  And the fact is, the pics are just not out there.  Maybe I will do it ... maybe I won't. 

Either way ... this is the journey.  HERE is where it will all be in black and white and color too!
Come and read, look ... and if not that's cool too. 
More thoughts and pictures next time!
Peace
~T

Me and my lovey!

Me and my spawn at Niagara Falls in October 2013

My Diet

So many people have been asking what it's like after surgery.  Can I eat normal?  What do I eat? Do I exercise?  How much?  When?  How often do I eat?  Does anything bother my stomach?

Well let's start off by me saying that I made a lot of changes in the YEAR before surgery.  I cut out fast food and soda.  Then I moved onto portion control.  Then I moved onto lowering my sugar intake and my carb intake.  I then began to really look at the servings and measure out a serving.  And after doing that my sugar numbers were still not coming down and I was not losing much weight.  THEN I decided the surgery was my only way to help me become healthy.  And it was the best decision I have ever made!  But here is a run down of some things.

*First off..... I do not eat any fake shit.  I don't do margarine, artificial sweeteners, etc.  I use real freaking butter, real sugar and real cream.  I do not use low fat anything.

*I do not have any carbonated beverages

*I do not drink with my meals and wait at least a half an hour after eating to drink.

*I do not eat anything with more than 5-10 grams of sugar (I like to stay around 7g)

*I keep my carbs under 80g a day.  

*I make sure my portions are smaller than my fist.

*My protein intake is 60-80 grams a day

*I make sure I am only have ONE serving of something when I eat

*I make sure my body is getting some sort of fuel every 2-3 hours

Typical Day

Breakfast: any one of these

scrambled egg

Protein shake

Belvita crackers

Oatmeal

Protein bar (watch sugar and carb content)

Refrained beans, fried egg and dab of sour cream with shredded cheese

Lunch: any one of these

Cucumbers and Tomatoes with shredded cheese

Rolled up salami, ham or turkey with provolone

Half slice of wheat bread with peanut butter

Cottage cheese with pineapple

Protein shake

Dinner: 

I eat dinner with my family and eat what they eat. 

I just have a very small portion

Some of the things we eat are:

Pork chops and veggies

Chicken and veggies

American Chop Suey

Fish (salmon or cod) with veggies

Chili

Soups

You get the idea ...usual family dinner food.  I usually grill my meats all year around.  I steam my veggies.  

Snacks: 3X a day mid-morning, mid-afternoon and before bed

I ALWAYS have a HIGH packed protein shake as my snack before sleeping for any length of time (longer than four hours) 

Protein shake

Protein bar

Peanut butter crackers

Belvita crackers

Banana

I am not as diligent as I would like to be about my water intake.  And I do drink coffee with cream and sugar.  I have about 12oz of coffee a day ...full caffeine not decaf... I mean, damn what's the point of that.  I also do not deny myself anything.  I apparently have a very "un-fussy" pouch.  I know some will think this is a slippery slope indeed and I am not going to get into whether it is or it isn't.  This is what works for ME.  Everyone is different.  Do what your nutritionist says.  Do what your doctor says.  Do what your pouch is telling you

I am fortunate enough where as soon as something hits the inside of my mouth ... I know whether it is going to spell doom for me or not.  I have NOT dumped but have gotten terrible gas and upset belly for a half and hour or so.  A time or two spent some time in the bathroom having the poops.  Hey ... People do want to know these things!  Lol!  So when I eat something and I get that feeling ...guess what?  I stop eating it.  Tuna is a no-no.  Cereal is a no-no.  And a few other things here and there.

What I guess it comes down to is that we are all going to be different from this surgery and all our journeys are going to be different.  I have lost 120lbs since February of THIS year.  I now weigh what I did when I was 18 years old.  I am the smallest pant size I have ever, ever been.  I went from a size 24-24 to fitting into a sz. 10!  I am pretty much at a stand still as far as my weight is concerned at 158.  And I am happy with that.  I do NOT obsess over the scale or the number.  I go by how my clothes fit and how I feel and look.  Last year at this time I was 278.  I feel good.  I am sleeping better (no CPAP!), my diabetes is GONE!  This is all the proof I need to know whatever I am doing is working for ME.

As far as exercise ....ugh!  That's another story.  I feel like of course, I should be exercising and need to be exercising.  But I just don't.  I absolutely HATE it.  And I feel so much pressure from the weight loss community and society in general about this.  As if I don't go to the gym or get my ass out running every day I will not be successful on this journey.  I am an active person and always have been.  I just move faster now because I have less to lug around.  Do I think I need to exercise ...sure.  I am not as strong as I used to be.  That's the only thing that bothers me.  Do I think I need to spend all of my free time sweating my ass of in the gym to get stronger ...no.  No one is going to MAKE me do it.  I have to be ready to do it.  But I am sick of the pressure of people in general saying you HAVE to get out there and do it or long term success is not possible.

I just have to do what is right for me.  Right now I am doing it.  I am healthy and that is all that matters.

Thanks for stopping by and reading!  

Love and peace to you all!

-T

Why am I sticking my belly out here lol!  

A great recent before and after!

I was beautiful and active before ...I just wasn't as healthy as I am now!

I am still here....are you?

I did not forget about you, dear reader!  Lots of exciting things going on!  Just got back from my Thirty-One conference in GA!  ONE HUNDRED pounds lighter than last year!  Yes!  Lots to tell!  I promise to blog soon!  But in the meantime, here are some before and after of some conference pictures and a few of my fav!  The most awesome one was the expression on my pal, John's face when he saw me at conference!  He didn't even recognize me!  What a wonderful reaction he had!  Priceless!